Thoughts at 2 in the morning

It's funny isn't it? It's such an agonising and tiring cycle, how people only start to care when you give up, how people only care for the people who gives them the least, and forsake those who are always there for us.

Yes, you may think you're the one hurting right now, for being ignored and neglected by the person you care the most about... But have you wondered if are actually hurting someone who's trying so hard to get your attention, but constantly fails to do so too?

Well, I'm saying this from personal experience, I'm not sure if it works the same way for everyone.

I've been feeling like the loneliest person on earth lately, just cos I was pretty much deprived of attention from people I gave the world to.

It's like nobody notices what I do for them, until I stop doing so.

However, after giving it some thought for hours one night, I found it disturbing how I was probably doing the same thing to a lot of people who really wanted to be there for me.

I unintentionally and sub-consciously pushed the people who care for me away and shut them out, and rather waste my tears on people who wouldn't even spare second of their day to give a thought about me.

And that's when I start to wonder, maybe that's why I've been ignored - Because you can never be too nice to people, they'll naturally take you for granted at some point.

I thought to myself - Why? Why are humans built in such a way. I can't comprehend.

Not long after, I deduced that, perhaps it's normal. I won't deny it's still the worst feeling nature has ever created whenever you feel like nobody cares about you nor appreciates your existence, but I realised something else that's way more important...

I'm learning to appreciate everyone around me and to choose the right people to treat the right way.

Like they say, you don't wanna lose the moon while counting the stars.